Final exams are here and, for once, I am paying attention to the events leading up to them. So far, I have seen the exorbitantly priced success gifts, the dedication services and the jovial mood surrounding that final meeting between parent and child.We bless the Lord for the changing times because, back then, apart from the last visitation before my final exams, I never had a dedication service. Was it just my school? My people, tell me. Did you have dedication services while all we got was one final stern warning to ensure we performed well?That warning carried enough weight to see one through the entire examination period without messing around.This is how that last visitation played out. After a round of discussions with the teachers, my mother would study my report card again, critique the marks and remind me of everything the teachers had said. All this while, my father said very little because, more often than not, the atmosphere was already charged.You see, the teachers had caught on to the fact that my mother listened to them more than she listened to me. So, they shared even what was unnecessary. With the atmosphere that tense, the best we could do was listen and nod.Somewhere in that conversation, she would remind me that I came from a poor family.’I am a poor woman. I do not pick money from a tree. You had better read hard because I have no mother or father to seek help from.’Then, almost immediately, she would add, ‘And if you fail Maths, you will repeat.’At A-level, the warning was even more frightening. She told me I would repeat the entire the two classes!Forget the fact that the two statements were contradictory. The fear had already been planted, and I simply had to read.But looking back, I wonder whether she thought I actually wanted to repeat a class. Why would I fancy sitting before the same teachers who had terrorised me throughout the year? Besides, I was already tired of reading abstract stuff. Another year in the same class was punishment enough without anyone raising a cane against me.So yes, some of us read out of fear because we knew that whatever awaited us if we failed was more than we could handle.Looking at what happens today, beyond the fancy success gifts, there are dedication services, encouraging pep talks, hugs, pats on the back and reassuring smiles.Ehhh, I kind of envy you Gen Zs!Could it be that these millennial parents had had enough of being terrified and decided that the cycle should end with them? I hope not entirely, because I do believe some stern warnings were necessary to keep some of us in line.But how I wish we had never been reminded of our poverty or the fact that our grandparents were not there to help.Mind you, both grandmothers were still alive. But maybe, just maybe, they were not in a position to pay our school fees.Forget about the lament…I wish you all the best in your exams. Go and ace! The writer, Joan Salmon, is a parent.