Records fom Departmenth of Health report that around 3.2 to 3.5 deaths per 100,000 Filipinos are by suicide, lower than global statistics.
This is still a serious cause for concern, especially given the following data points:
30% of suicide cases are by peopled aged 15 to 24
men are four times more likely to commit suicide than women (whether they push through or not)
1 in 5 young people have seriously considered ending their lives
According to Dr. Carmina Charmaine G. Bernardo, a psychiatrist and Makati Medical Center’s Head of the Mood and Anxiety Resource and Referral Center, Institute of Neuroscience, mental illnesses and personality disorders can affect someone’s ability to make sound judgment.
The same applies to a traumatic life event – a bad breakup, death in the family, physical or emotional abuse, financial loss, or a ruined career – added the doctor.
“A person dealing with a painful illness or terminal disease may decide to end their suffering prematurely,” said Dr. Bernardo. “Intense feelings of worthlessness, loneliness, and being a burden to others have also pushed people to take their own lives.
This means particular triggers or stressors can lead to individuals taking action and “free themselves from what they perceive to be unbearable and unending physical or emotional pain.”
The hard part then for others who knows a loved one thinking of taking their life is to be aware of such triggers and stressors, as well as be observant of any out-of-the-ordinary behavior.
Dr. Bernardo pointed out the difficulty in this scenario, considering suicide “can pretend all is well to not arouse suspicion.” There are instances when individuals make themselves look calm and happy after a bout of severe depression, possibly meaning “they are resolved with their decision to end their life.”
It is, therefore, a huge responsibility to look out for loved ones with suicidal thoughts, and preventing them pushing through will literally mean saving a life. Particular ‘celebrations’
Dr. Bernardo shared that birthdays, anniversaries, and special holidays can be sensitive times for suicidals, citing international research that found Mondays and New Year’s Day have the highest risk of suicide mortality.
The reason behind birthday blues and more are that special days remind others that they are getting older or there is no significant other to mark the occasion.
“Call a friend or loved one to check on how they’re doing or make plans to go out on that day. Your company will be a welcome distraction from their dark thoughts,” the doctor advised.
Reckless behavior
A person who disregards their safety, health, and well-being may mean they no longer value their life, Dr. Bernardo warned.
These include those who drink too much, drive too fast, do not watch where they are going, miss doctor appointments, or skip prescription medication.
The doctor advises to offer accompanying them to appointments or be the designated driver when they are under the influence.
Seeing others
While some individuals contemplating to end their life tend to withdraw from the world, there are those who go out of their way to seek out certain friends or relatives, often to forgive another person or ask for forgiveness.
Dr. Bernardo describes it as a possible “form of closure” like when they give away prized possessions as if to “say goodbye” with something to remember them by.
“Simply accept the token and assure the person that it will be in your safekeeping for now,” the doctor said. “It’s a subtle way of saying you will give it back when things get better.”
Being there
It is difficult for any party to discuss suicide “but it has to be done,” says Dr. Bernardo.
“Ask them pointblank gently and coming from a place of concern and sincerity. And be prepared to listen – not judge, scold, or dismiss their feelings,” she advised. “Let them talk and express themselves as much as they want. Sometimes, venting provides them with much-needed relief from negative thoughts.”
Emotionally vulnerable people can find enough reason to live knowing there is someone who genuinely cares for them and wants to help them get out of their black hole.
“Offer hope and the prospect of better things ahead if they just give themselves and others a chance,” the doctor added.
One should evaluate if a suicidal loved one is in immediate danger. These would be those who planned the process with the means to carry out the plan, a set time, and an intention.
Dr. Bernardo advised that if an attempt is imminent, ensure they do not have access to lethal objects like drugs, guns, or knives which they can use for self-harm.
“Never ever leave a suicidal person alone. The best that you can do is to call emergency services or bring the person to the nearest hospital where they can get the necessary professional help,” she ended.