I’m happy to have a spouse who continues to stand by me through all kinds of ups and downs, but my girl besties give me so much joy, as well. They gamely spend hours with me combing countless store racks, dress up a dreary-looking hospital room with the cutest pink bathroom and table accessories, regularly send recommendations for the latest K-dramas to binge on and even babysat me at home during a cancer bout, so my husband could work with less worry.
I truly believe that even the happiest of wives need their besties and I’m no exception. Liza, Rose Anne, Eliza, Nina, Kara, Chona, Janine, Lizette and Kara – to name a few. Life wouldn’t be the same without these girlfriends of 44 years and counting.
Marriage blesses us with a cherished partner to grow old with – but friendship gifts you with soul sisters for the journey. As the years pass, my female besties are more than just lunch dates and shopping companions. They are also anchors and cheerleaders in hard times, and the tears and laughter shared bind us securely, no matter how far or long since the last get-together. Being with my husband keeps me safe and loved, while being with my besties keeps me sane and young.
Husbands don’t do girl talk
Let’s face it: even the most loving husband has his limits. He’ll listen when you complain or vent, and nod along when sharing a story about work or home drama. But like most men, he’s not going to dissect every sarcastic statement uttered to you. Besties however, will dwell on this. They’ll replay the scene, suggest motives and even provide witty should-have-said comeback lines.
Besties keep us young
As women age, responsibilities pile up – kids, aging parents, a career, endless errands and more – so it’s easy to get caught up in routines. But time with girlfriends snaps us out of autopilot. Whether it’s giggling over the shenanigans of household help, taking short trips together, or sending each other silly memes, besties bring out our playful side.
They understand without speaking
It’s great to have people in your life who know you so well. A friend who instantly gets what you mean by your tone, remembers your family dynamics, or can read your mind even before you speak. With besties, you don’t have to give a lengthy backstory to be seen or understood – they already know, which is a big relief.
They are our emotional rechargers
Life always throws curveballs. Even in a stable marriage, it’s natural to face moments of stress, loss or self-doubt so besties are our cushions. They’ll cry, pray with and distract you with laughter until you’re ready to stand tall again. Having women in your corner doesn’t weaken a marriage – they enrich it because after bonding time with them, you go back to your spouse happier, lighter and more whole.
Our other forever
We all yearn for a ‘forever love’ but friendship is another kind of forever. Who doesn’t like celebrating romantic love but the quiet, steady love of a best friend deserves just as much credit. Aside from my husband, I know my besties will walk beside me through the gray hairs, midlife shifts and all other unwritten chapters of my life.
My husband is my forever plus-one but my besties are my forever plus-fun. So don’t feel guilty about spending time with girlfriends. Marriage and women friendships aren’t rivals – they’re teammates and when both are strong, life shines brighter. After all, while husbands and diamonds may be forever, besties sparkle even brighter.